time could kill.

to start again.

2011-01-09T11:42:00.000+08:00

it's a new year, it's a new decade, and it's going to be a very different life. so i figured that it would be appropriate to leave these splattered pages behind and start again.

http://splatteredpages.blogspot.com

christmas

2010-12-26T23:34:00.002+08:00

i think i'm getting lazy to post... lol

i've not been at home much recently. 10 to 13 was VIP, 17 to 20 was RCYC, 23 to 26 was overseas, then 1st and 2nd next year got VI retreat (still haven't received invite lol). then after that is open house, get back chinese results (CRAP) and induction programme lalala

oh well.

VIP

2010-12-14T12:52:00.002+08:00

VIP camp's over. quite awesome.

i just wanna sleep until i don't feel sleepy anymore -.-

where are youu

origin

2010-11-19T10:24:00.002+08:00

nov camp was ok except for the curdled spaghetti sauce incident. which kinda spoiled everything. fright night didn't go that well though :/

bukit timah hill is an awesome place for a hike. but must take the toughest route... if not it's just like an uphill stroll lol

why do you always think you're right? that's the big flaw you see, it's what makes the same thing happen so often around the world. years behind in terms of thinking, failure to understand today's world. i've done my job, and you refuse to give me a break. now you wonder why i want to lock the door?

appreciate what you have, because others may not even have it to begin with.

oh well maybe i'm wrong and these are all just rantings. but do i care? not really.

i can't wait for VIP. lol

grad night

2010-11-11T01:19:00.001+08:00

grad night was AWESOME SHIZZ.

ok let's start from the beginning. there was something called HMT O Levels. paper one was not too bad, i just hope they won't be too anal. paper 2 was completely horrible, mainly cos i kinda ran out of time :/ but i always suck in paper 2 anyway... lol. i just hope for a C6 or better ._.

then went home to rest/slack for awhile.

after that, went to outram park mrt carrying a bass and amp. (cos i was scared that the provided amp would screw up again like in rs audis, but it didn't!) took awhile to find nigel lmao cos the place had so many damn exits -.- well eventually managed it though.

ok from this part on it gets a little blurry. there was a lot of good food, and i distinctly remember overspamming vinegar on my 2nd bowl of shark's fin soup ._. then there was a point where my table started singing happy birthday and eventually the whole batch joined in >_> after that and some stuff were the performances.

i just think our song choice was good lol. audience was sick :D yy's band was good (just the volume balance thing) but sadly not many ppl knew the guys/girl there so... lol and annelise-turned-balls-of-cabbage did impromptu performance of their RS songs xD awesome

i'm just lazy to recount everything here hehe. maurice won an 8GB 6th gen ipod nano, and the iPad (?@!%$@) went to shaun yeo. lawl. i wanted the x-mini :(

and seriously, that was the best unite cheer i've heard in ages. voice is returning to normal now (lol it only died at the last 15 minutes).

and now i go to sleep. oh yeah.

happy belated birthday to myself lol.

grad night was AWESOME SHIZZ.

madmen

2010-11-08T17:44:00.009+08:00

oh yeah.

today was good. wednesday should be fine too then :)

a madman believes that he is the only sane one

last day

2010-11-02T21:43:00.003+08:00

last day of school tomorrow! doesn't feel particularly like the last day because there's still chinese and grad night. well after grad night i suppose it'll be different.

gosh it'll be awesome after chinese :D

and i don't speak for myself... i speak for everyone.

carrots and sticks don't work

2010-10-31T23:33:00.002+08:00

i've been reading a book called "carrots and sticks don't work"... it's been awesome. people who are into this kind of stuff should give it a go :P

lots of stuff happened the previous week. stuff such as, FOUR HOURS OF CHINESE while the rest of the school happily went around munching on popcorn during RE congress D: quite sian. at least i passed the practice paper xD

AND MR JEE IS LEAVING RI NEXT JANUARY. THIS IS SO SAD. we need to quickly extort his next school from other teachers ._.

then there was the epic bag-inverting + hiding prank, for more details see chi tun's album on fb. and sam chan's epic facepalm by mrs d'cruz, when she koped his phone and wallet when he went to the toilet and left them on the table, but he thought people like ryan took it. lolol

(Y) for playing pacman on mr tan's not-so-ancient plug-and-play on the projector. (not like i played it... but would have wanted to if mr jee didn't come in so early) best part was, mr jee came in and thought that we were screwing around with the projector, when he realised that he wasn't the only teacher in the classroom. selfpwn

god of war: ghost of sparta is sick stuff, and i've only been playing it for... 30 minutes. and it's time to go sleep.

YAY I'M GETTING A BASS NEXT WEEKEND

3.2

2010-10-26T22:01:00.003+08:00

got back all the EOY papers these 2 days. not too bad, only a few disappointing ones, at least this year's papers were much better than previous years :D and here are the (not too bad) scores, with overall GP and non-final %:

English - 43/60, 3.6 (73%)
Chinese - 104.5/200, 2.4 (55%)
Maths 1 - 53.5/60, 3.6 (79%)
Maths 2 - 28/60, 2.8 (62%)
Physics - 69/80, 3.6 (74%)
Chem - 57/80, 3.6 (72%)
Geog - 28/40, 2.8 (64%)
Hist - 30/40, 2.8 (62%)
SS - 26/40, 3.2 (68%)

so effectively i can throw away any of the 3 2.8s and still get 3.2 overall. lol awesome improvement from PR2's 2.85 that got me into SSP. i guess that helped a lot

english vocab was a disaster, 1/5 ._. and there's always the question that i answered with a phrase from the WRONG PARAGRAPH. chinese was the prelim 2 in august, at least i passed :D

maths 1 was disappointing... 6 marks gone to careless, could have easily gotten my first ever overall 4.0 LOL. maths 2 was gg, expected it but still, wanted a 33 to get 3.2 D:

physics was awesome. but then they had to take away my 70 because of a marking error. asses. chem was kinda better than i expected, plus i got 2 marks added to the original 55 so yay.

geog was okay, really didn't know how i'd do but was hoping i'd do better xD but still it's not too bad. hist was quite good, could have done better if i mugged more china and shifted my entire 3rd point for q2 to the 2nd point. gosh. SS was just disappointing, was kinda expecting better but bleh.

assassin's creed is fun. but i have to prevent myself from getting addicted because I NEED TO DO CHINESE (and finish this post quickly).

and there's still unfinished business.

fail forward.

accidental hiatus

2010-10-23T11:31:00.001+08:00

lol i just realised i haven't posted here in awhile. need to think of something. at least results are coming back next week.

meanwhile, jiayou :)

EOYs

2010-10-10T22:57:00.002+08:00

here we go.

tired

2010-10-03T22:44:00.000+08:00

going back to school after 1 week out of action. lol

feels weird. dam tired

stomach flu

2010-09-27T19:11:00.002+08:00

need to rethink my mugging plan. already lost almost 2 days worth of mugging over the weekend.

i hope i recover by tomorrow afternoon/evening. being sick sux, can't even do physics properly :/

well at least i'm not too far behind schedule. just need to compress and stay focused more. lol

don't worry too much, i'll be fine

sick

2010-09-25T12:36:00.003+08:00

fever + cough + headache + makings of a sore throat. zzz.

my physics is really >_> now. common sense topics like CRO are ok but when it comes to stuff that needs brain power i start to foam. maybe it's the teacher :P but i dunno. hope things change

and they're just missing the point of being where they are now. i dunno. the whole thing is so... time-wasting, and energy-wasting. it's like going around in circles. seriously, they have better and more important things to do. or perhaps we have failed them? where's the trust and unity? all those principles and values

need to recover soon ._.

RIRC

2010-09-18T12:41:00.001+08:00

i remember clearly, more than three and a half years ago, sitting in a seminar room listening to someone i vaguely remember as "mrs. ang" introduce us to the CCA called "red cross". you could say that i wasn't particularly happy about being put in RC, since it was my 7th choice. but i wasn't really looking for anything in particular from a CCA at that time, so i just stuck with it.

little did i know that would be the best decision that i have ever made in my entire life.

the first training still sticks in very vividly in my mind. there was this congregation of sec 1s at the raja block foyer, and we all saw the sec 2s and sec 3s standing stock still in some 3-row formation, in senang diri position. monkey see monkey do, we did the same - aside from the load of fidgeting. then we were brought up to the 7th floor of the raja block, by some weird guy in uniform. we didn't even know his name. i forgot the exact order of things, but i remember that there were 3 main things we had to do: cross a corridor without our feet touching the floor (meaning we had to use our shirts as "shoes"); put our shirts into a pile, fall in, then take back a shirt (notice i said A not OUR); and find 3 pebbles in lockers all around the raja block, in which the person finding the pebbles would be allowed to "go home early". all these stuff were methods to instill in us the value "batch unity". by the way, that weird guy in uniform was called abdul hadi, as we eventually found out.

i can't remember exactly what happened after that though.

we were doing sedia and senang diri for 30 minutes. i fell out sometime because i got nauseous :/
we ran from the parade square to the basketball court, did 30 pushups/crunches, ran back. rinse and repeat.
we did push ups over drain covers.
we did hentak as a forfeit in war games.
we did 100 jumping jacks and 100 crunches over the span of how long? in the main atrium as a unit (well not including the then-sec 4s)
we stood in squad for 45 minutes due to the infinite restarting of flag raising parade
we wondered why we couldn't tell the sec 4s about POC.
qi wen cried (just a little lol) during his POC, the first POC we witnessed.
we went for a CBD hike during nov camp.
we played scissors papers stone.

WATER OF LI!

sadly, sec 2 was a blur. there wasn't really anything interesting under the roman and ottoman empire, as we said in that year's POC skit script. there were some stuff i definitely remember though... "i seriously don't want to do this to you all" "my grandmother's tortoise can move faster than you all" "you all don't piss me off or you all will get it from me" "i can see people fidgeting blatantly under my nose" and all that. ah, good times. before long, it was time for B57 to take over, and i daresay that everyone was happy to see the last of the roman empire. lol. sadly, nov camp 09 had a dismal batch attendance of 4... hey some of us were overseas, but i think it was also due to a leftover from the roman empire. wish i could have gone

sec 3 was the time where everything changed, and everything started. there's really too much too say, and too much worth remembering. or maybe it's just not as interesting like the above stuff ._. but it really holds a lot of meaning. then we took over, then we passed out yesterday. i'm just lazy. lol.

if i were to compress the 2 years of sec 3 and 4 into a single sentence, i would simply quote the quote that b59 put on our appreciation certs: "it's not because we have to, but because we care."

now for the thanks... this is gonna take awhile

firstly, thanks to my batch for all the memories. although you guys weren't the most fantastic batchmates, we were always quite nice to each other and i think that's the best thing we can ever have :)

thanks to abdul hadi for being the most awesome VI/senior that i've ever known, for doing so much, for putting up with us and our nonsense xD and for teaching me how to be a better person.

thanks to b55, b56 and b57 for shaping our batch through different means. really gotta say sorry to b57... you guys deserved a much better POC, this year's and last year's POC should be swapped, you guys were the one that should have passed out this way :/

thanks to b59, b60, and b61 for being our juniors and kids :P although sometimes i get frustrated by some of the stupid things you guys do, it's really rewarding and heartening to see you guys grow as people since you first stepped into this unit, and see the change in you guys over the months or even years.

thanks for the most awesomest fantastic POC ever.

thank you everyone for the memories.

i love you guys, and i'll be back.

promise.

as quickly as it came

RAGE

2010-09-08T11:44:00.002+08:00

RAGE XV was worth the 10 bucks, no doubt. still got some videos to upload!

saw someone with the same specs as deo on the MRT... lol

passed by the ULP hike route (science park to WCP) on the bus to NUS, brings back memories, not that it was particularly worth remembering at least for that part

and just had the misfortune to sit in front of MY during the concert ._.

we tried to carry sean all the way out of UCC but we were too nice :\

need to start doing more intensive work lol. i'm getting sidetracked too easily.

can't wait for EOYs to be over, but that means POP will have to come first.

as quickly as it first came

1 year

2010-09-04T18:22:00.002+08:00

exactly 1 year ago on this day, 4th september, was b57's POC. in 2 weeks time, we'll be gone from the unit. really so fast, isn't it. still remember searching raja block lockers for pebbles during the first training in sec 1. good times.

to the facom team: don't be disheartened, don't give up, we've got another shot to throw all we've got back at them and show everyone who's supposed to be up there

i ll li

a lot on my mind... not the place to say here lol

teacher's day

2010-09-01T20:40:00.002+08:00

happy teacher's day. lol

yesterday's concert was madness. went back to cat high for the first time in 18 months

today went to mug, jam and crash facom. and buy stuff

the last training didn't really feel like the last. maybe because there's still FACOM + POP, or because i know this won't be my real last training.

ohwell.

2 more days to holidays at least :)

IUGD

2010-08-25T21:26:00.003+08:00

although we usually get last in everything, i think what we should be proud of is that no matter what happens, we don't blame each other for it, and stick together. you don't usually hear a "fuck la why you cut corner" or "WTF why you let in that goal", and instead we cheer each other on.

it's a really amazing thing but i don't know how to describe it. something not every CCA, or perhaps even every UG has... i guess it's what put the unity into unit (or should it be the other way round LOL), what we could call the RIRC "family" in a sense. true all for one, one for all indeed :) that should be the way. same thing when we go out for competitions, if someone screws up during the actual fight it's not his fault, because you know he didn't mean it.

of course there are some exceptions like being selfish, forsaking others for your own personal interest and all that bullshit, but that's because that doesn't fit into "family" in the first place. it isn't always about winning, but doing your best and having the "BRING IT ON" spirit :P lol

hope this thing will last, i'm really worried it'll die out :\ but maybe i'm just being paranoid haha.

great job to everyone who came today, and for those who didn't you guys really missed out on a lot of fun xD meanwhile have a good rest :)

LEG PAIN (actually it's more of calf). and the next thing is... HMT PRELIMS ._. zzz.

CRAP

2010-08-22T22:46:00.002+08:00

what happened to my plan to start revising for EOYs on national day weekend? LOL. i think i'll start hardcoring in sept hols... when there's no homework to get in the way.

soc doc 25/30 + 10/15 was really unexpected :D makes a 3.6 for SS much much easier now woohoo

3 more trainings left to go. i dun wanna leave, really... but at the same time it may be time to have a break from everything and focus on mugging too

whatever happens, bring it on :) i ll li

thoughts

2010-08-21T00:07:00.003+08:00

if you guys feel that you really don't want me to come back, please do tell me early so that i can find something else to do with my holidays.

band aid

2010-08-14T23:51:00.000+08:00

today was a long day...

morning had interviews. reached the bishan road bus stop quite early, but found that it was locked zzz. too lazy to walk in the rain + with guitar and laptop so waited for some guy to come along and open the door. in the end someone used his umbrella to poke the switch on the other side ._. won't say too much about interviews :P

went to eat lunch at LJS, got this stupid guy sitting in the middle of the 8-man table reading his newspaper and didn't even touch his meal -_- idiots. the golden crunch trio was quite worth it though :D at least a break from 2pc chicken. the fish tasted ok, the shrimp was NAISE.

then had to go back to school for physics PT. tried it again this time with enamel-coated wire but failed AGAIN ._. apparently most people across the level are failing in making their stuff work so yay xD

finally band aid. at first was quite nervous because we kinda screwed up in the rehearsals >_> actually the only bad thing was the volume and the noob drumset zzz. mostly attributed to the need for super rushed set-up. actual performance was MUCH better :D but seize the day was better than afterlife lol.

i'm tired, AGAIN

la

2010-08-11T19:34:00.001+08:00

it's actually quite nice doing work if SOMEHOW i dun get distracted and i actually know how to do everything offhand.

NDP commanders this year were... weird. but better than the chinese guy last year

sleeping 11 hours is (Y)

nightmare

2010-08-03T23:31:00.002+08:00

WOO ORAL DEFENCE IS OVER.

today was funny. CLE turned into a dialogue session with mr. eng because DT didn't come again. then after school went to crash facom since we weren't watching inception (RAWR). ah the good old days of being a casualty when crashing facom xD

then saw nigel's tag about nightmare, went to check HMV's facebook and the really funny thing was HMV called me 5 minutes later to tell me nightmare was out in stores.

anyway...

OYEA.

i need to sleep... as usual

nightmare... NOT

2010-07-27T16:54:00.002+08:00

nightmare stocks are DELAYED ._.
HMV @ 313, HMV @ CityLink, That CD Shop @ Raffles City, Gramophone @ City Hall ALL don't have :(

testimony

2010-07-26T22:35:00.002+08:00

just occurred to me yesterday while i was doing RC testimonial... there's so many things done in the past 4 years, i was finding it really difficult to even translate it into words

lots of screw-ups along the way, lots of things i would have done much differently

and now that journey's ending soon and there's still lots of things i haven't done, or failed to do in the 4 years here. i suppose that's one reason i wanna come back o.O

anyway i keep forgetting to say this... dunno why. proud of the sec2 fdcommers for progressing so much in that 4 months :D still remember all the crash course of silver and gold in early nov last year haha. sheesh i wanna do that again

bleh

now trying to think of a theme for showcase portfolio. i've changed a lot since i opened that green door and entered the aircon blast back in 2007, i don't think i'd recognise myself today if you asked me then HAHA

if you were given a chance to rewind the clock and live life all over, would you?

so far away

2010-07-23T23:47:00.002+08:00

i still insist that "so far away (by A7X)" 2nd solo is epic.

flu is getting better... i suppose the earlier nights + lots of sleep today + panadol helped. it's more of irritating than anything >_> makes me feel tired too.

gotta think about what i'm doing sometimes, not just for one thing but everything in general, where i'm heading. lol this is just damn messy.

need to stop slacking.

bleh

pizza

2010-07-17T21:55:00.003+08:00

it's been awhile since i had pizza :)

today was a pretty long day and started pretty badly. woke up at 7.30 and received a call from mrs. ang which i redirected to yatyg :P apparently her house outside got flooded and she was stuck there. LOL

waited for the stupid bus to MRT for so long. it probably got stuck in the water somewhere. 43 came after half an hour or so, 156 was nowhere to be seen. so by the time i left the bus stop it was already like 8.45 -_-

2nd round of suay-ness came at the LRT. basically i went on the wrong side of the LRT, so had to go back to sengkang to take the one going to compassvale. then the one i took went the long way to compassvale (past martin's stop and all that) so by the time i reached compassvale it was a little over 9.30.

apparently the CAC team was late for registration because half the team was stuck at serangoon trying to flag down a cab because they got lost. gosh. that lateness gave us a 5% penalty which MIGHT have made a difference -_-

in the end we got 3rd for the environmental outreach. nothing for the challenge shield category - quite expected, but i just feel sad for ching wai who put in a lot ._.

in the afternoon was CRD. for SOME reason jeremy told us to wear full RCU when all the other schools were wearing school uniform. probably he mistook "wear RCU" as for everyone or "uniform" as RCU. oh well.

after all the awards and certs were presented and the CAC finalists did their presentations, finally there was the reception. FOOD! although a bit late at least it was nice. chocolate eclairs PWN. so do custard puffs, samosas, and spring rolls. then went to change back to unit shirt (FINALLY).

sadly no one got lanyarded this year again... as usual lol.

then went home, met zhiyuan and a bunch of greendale sec 3s at the interchange ._.

gosh i need to sleep.
AGAIN!

buried alive

2010-07-15T21:33:00.003+08:00

i need to sleep.

monday was day off, so probably half the people spent their morning recovering from the world cup match. i didn't watch though ._. yay spain.

tuesday, maths PT was quite ok but nearly lost 2 marks because of an oversight ._. interhouse humans quiz was entertaining i suppose.

yesterday's training was... what to say? shall keep it quiet. the free period was spent discussing scandals in the library LOL

today was funny. they gave us the anti-drug windmill so now you get to see wind farms and potential greenwave projects (._.) in each class. after school went jamming. we mainly played your betrayal and waking the demon, for some reason i kept forgetting lyrics. then one of the studio's caretakers/workers/whatever-you-call-it came in and said we were quite good for a half-year-old band when we were packing up (Y)

this week has been suspiciously devoid of homework. 6 levels of legendary dark knight in DMC4 makes devil hunter seem like cake when you play it again.

BURIED ALIVE PWNS (see playlist)

PaNic

2010-07-11T00:37:00.003+08:00

today's been a really long day. woke up at 7.45 and reached home at 2358 :D

started with meeting at IMH. shan't say much ._. then went back home to rest awhile and pack, left for school a little before 11.

went to buy gold pens + guestbook + lunch before going to school. apparently popular ran out of the black mounting board we used for POC so we had to make do with some flimsy blue-ish vanguard instead. bleh.

ok after that is a blur, so shall sum it up.

edited stuff for PN, basically made final preparations, cadet rehearsals, testing of lights, sound, AV, blablabla

fixing the stupid projector which refused to project anything >_> turns out it was because the black and white wires were swapped. son of mother.

what was next? everything was mad after that.

basically, AV screwed up like some shit until i decided to just not squeeze everything in and take out stuff instead, which was why the back half of PN was considerably better (i hope).

note to self and future batches - whenever doing AV, use separate laptops to control audio and visual (ppt + video), then plug the sound cable into the respective laptop when playing stuff with sound.

good thing, at least everyone downstairs enjoyed themselves.

then after everything was packed up and cleared, went to macs for dinner (FINALLY). couldn't finish the fries so i let it all get koped. lol. then went to stone at the empty area beside the mrt with (lazy to type out all the names).

finally decided to go home at around 2320.

now i just want to sleep.

bond

2010-07-05T23:46:00.002+08:00

hmm. where were we?

friday. filming for PIAN, first time i've ever seen the sec4 AEP room lol. i overslept on the way back, ended up at least 5 or 6 stops after my stop and reached home at 9 plus instead of 8.30 bleh.

saturday and sunday had nothing much, lucky because i was getting sleepy :D

whole of today was PIAN filming/rehearsal/prep. took an insane 24 takes to get the bond scene correct, compared to just a few takes for jigsaw (some were single take). guess bond doesn't fit me at all. LOL. ate big mac for the first time in a very very long time - note to self, try and squeeze the whole thing because my mouth isn't big enough.

still have zuo wen + history factor worksheet + phys ex 19 to do. at least tomorrow is a super slack day :)

4 days left to PIAN!

401

2010-07-01T22:54:00.002+08:00

sometimes i really don't know what to do, or whether what i'm doing is the right thing. if i do hit the wrong path, please guide me back, for i'm still learning. and if i screw up somewhere, please forgive me, although if you don't that's fine too.

that was directed to no particular person. maybe i'm just tired and confused.

wake up

2010-06-30T00:22:00.001+08:00

gosh i have to frkn wake up.

and i almost forgot to take the pills today.

batam

2010-06-28T21:06:00.002+08:00

:ok before i dive in to the epicness of today, let's recall batam first.

day 1. there was this funny incident at the money changer there as we didn't know the money exchanged was for 4 people instead of 3, so me and hadi kept thinking chye keong sir scammed us. lol. pitching a 10-man refugee tent is mad when everyone has only pitched dome tents before. well we still managed to get them up after 3 hours with the help of the batam/indo people :) why did they make tents so digustingly hard to pitch >_>

day 2 was... what? opening ceremony in RCU is really ._. when everything's in bahasa indonesia and the weather is HAWT. after that was souvenir workshop, tbh i almost fell asleep jeez. volleyball and random beach games were fun, and did the cool 4man on the chair thingy. WHO HAS THE VIDEO? after dinner were performances, it got boring towards the end because everything was cultural and the poetry/drama wasn't in english too. well it's not their fault about the language part ;x

day 3 started off with city tour. cornetto tiramisu ice cream pwns. well ice cream pwns anyway. luckily my cone wasn't stale like ching wai's ._. afternoon was batik and snail shell painting. my batik got kinda screwed cos my wax decided to drip large blobs all over. for the shells we decided to make "fruits" out of them. my supposed pumpkin looks ugly. at night were more performances just like last night... argh.

day 4 was closing ceremony. kena arrow to become squad leader >_> but then it started raining like mad so yay. sang songs did cheers and then when rain stopped the rest went to play volleyball with hadi commenting. (TEAM BALA) after that was shopping, first thing was A&W because singapore doesn't have any :( bought ice cream waffle and root beer float, close to bursting point. but GOOD FOOD cannot waste! then we went to buy some shirts for PN/etc and by the end of that we ran out of time so back we went. the campfire was BIG but kinda failed because the wood was wet. the BFYC banner was worse. the performances were much better this time, and just imagine 2 hours of mass-dancing with like 5 minute breaks here and there. epic.

day 5 was... unpitch tents, slack awhile, go back to singapore, dinner at kfc, go home, do stuff, sleep. yay.

OK i shall finally move on to today.

started with geog. bad from the start, 11/25 for section a and 9/15 for essay to give a just pass. chinese was worse, 9.5/20 for yyw, 37/70 for zw and 45.5/110 for paper 2, total 92/200. hey that beats last year's, the other way around. maths was 51/80. disgusting. then my group jacked ourselves by not bringing/reading the book, so we had to find a new one which is in my bag now and i'm supposed to be reading. OOPS. then ss got 11/20 and 13/20, total 24/40. zzz.

as you can see, my GPA is effectively screwed.

training went really bad. partly our fault too >_> it's ok, we'll get up and move on from there. got new unit shirt though :D

now time to read book club book (rice without rain by minfong ho) and it's really tempting to sleep.

filler

2010-06-28T00:28:00.000+08:00

i will post about batam tomorrow :)

wave

2010-06-18T22:22:00.002+08:00

ok my homework seems extremely screwed. haven't decided on bookclub book, greenwave may just overflow into week 1, lazy to do ex. 19 for physics, don't know what other homework there is.

can someone remind me? lol

last week gonna be eaten up by batam argh. therefore gg.

can i buy more time? think i need some.

not just for me, for us too

6pak

2010-06-10T23:56:00.002+08:00

6pak was really pwn for a last camp being part of the unit in name... haha wish others could have come too, wasn't fun without them

day 1 was floorball, ubin hike, and movie screening. got a lot of bites from ubin cos i didn't wanna wear track pants lol. i mean, WHO LIKES TRACK PANTS?! the movie was kinda screwed up cos there were no sound cables. but still funny enough haha. and then the EUACSA pizza! wish i could have tried the seafood one though xD everyone stole the hawaiian :(

day 2 was bedok reservoir park stuff and CBD hike. bedok was a little bleh except for the samuel video (EPIC LOL) but CBD was PWN gotta be there to know why. the dinner was daaaaaaaaaaaaaaam good. briyani rice + drumstick + papadum + pulut hitam for 2.50, completely wins the first day lunch from same stall. at night was the PVZ game, apparently quite a lot of ppl enjoyed it, so yay :D had "maximum" at night too hehe.

day 3 started off pretty bad, set off to RI delayed 30min cos of some background probs. but at first it was still ok, was following iota. after omega and epsilon decided to skip AMK morale went just kinda boomz. but in the end iota still won camp yay. after that had lunch at canteen and debrief. then dinner and home and SLEEP

it definitely feels weird to know that you won't be running trainings anymore, and instead taking a backseat role. feels like something's missing.

i just wonder how POP will feel like.

and no matter how busy i am, you're still there

madness

2010-06-03T22:40:00.002+08:00

in madness, there still needs to be discipline.
i hope i've succeeded.

to come back to reality, there's 6pak ahead,
good luck and all the best to everyone :)

and please get well soon,
hurts when you aren't.

acoustic

2010-05-30T10:38:00.002+08:00

it's been awhile since i posted AS USUAL ._.

i've become addicted again to the last fight and its variants (hence the playlist).

SO... let's see the plans for this week:
monday: chinese remedial + jamming
tues: RC stuff (sec 3s)
wed: RC stuff (general)
thurs: nothing in the morning, hougang campfire at night
fri: RC stuff (camp)

yes we still need a performance for hougang campfire LOL i think we're just going to end up making some crap one last minute.

and this thing was at Hard Rock Cafe RWS but they put "Zacky Vengeance" instead of "Synyster Gates". someone should go tell them...

hols

2010-05-21T19:59:00.002+08:00

ok i just realised my holidays are kinda bad.

week 1: 4h chinese remedial, 6pak prep
week 2: 6pak
week 3: nothing but probably visiting relatives
week 4: batam trip

and i somehow have to slot in greenwave which involves recording 4 songs and a music video. song-recording is gonna be a reaaaaaaaaal pain in the ass. not to mention all the other homework/stuff.

well at least we can get everything written by then :D

sleep

2010-05-19T23:55:00.001+08:00

i need more sleep.
halp.

which is quite sad.

OJF

2010-05-15T01:51:00.002+08:00

who were you?
what happened?
what did you want?

DR

2010-05-14T18:45:00.002+08:00

WOOT no more MYEs.

OK let's do a summary of how everything was...

HMT P1: not too bad topics, could write a decent amount of crap
HMT P2: zhtk was >_>, the compres were easy except the last one
SS: had to smoke a bit but wasn't that bad. damn scared run out of time ._.
chem: quite ok but i died on the aspirin question -_-
EL: had to chiong the AQ cos i was doing the compre too slow. bleh
maths: do-able, but there was this bunch of 3 questions in the middle i died at
hist: SMOKE BOMBZ
phys: easier than expected. i should have revised electricity argh
geog: a bit ._. so i just tried to crap up with anything i could.

anyway it's over so no point harping on about it :D

just went to davis to re-string my axe today. got a set of DR Tite-Fit MT-10s ($7.70), still the same price as EB Super-Slinky 9s (a little cheaper) because of the re-string service price :P

they seem promising, but only time will tell if they're really better than the EBs. and i still need to get used to the new gauge ._.

and sleep feels reaaaaaaaaaaaal good.

mid years

2010-05-09T21:27:00.003+08:00

yay midyears starting tomorrow.

the first thing i'm gonna do when my papers are over is to file EVERYTHING. i can't stand my own messiness LOL it's becoming quite hard to find things already.

and can't wait to resume work on rc stuff hehe... in comparison, schoolwork is damn boring after awhile ._. at least because they test it in this way.

becoming more and more addicted to buckethead's songs... but not that many excellent ones, still trying to find a good download for nottingham lace. gotta agree that he's one of the best shredders that actually make sense in terms of melody though.

having a few ideas on what to take in RJ le. but no idea what's in between that and working life ._.

and i'm getting closer and closer to playing alone solo :D

and

PAUSE

i need to get back to mugging/revising/bla.

respect

2010-05-06T22:22:00.002+08:00

so many times i've heard people use the term "losing respect".
but only recently i've began to realise what it really means.
haha nvm.

time to continue with maths ._.
can't wait for this to be over.

monologue

2010-05-02T13:00:00.002+08:00

i can't believe i woke up at 12.30 today.

yesterday was a long long long day. morning went to watch iron man 2 with yatyg and abdul. was quite worth it :D but wonder what would happen if they made a 3D version haha. the post-credits scene was a bit too fast though.

after that lunch at BK, then bowling (kyx came). i died ._. at least won yatyg HAHA

then had nothing to do so went to walk around iluma and bugis street. saw a lot of nice clothes and wished i had money LOL

dinner at bugis junction food court. the grill mania boneless chicken was nice lor... quote "why would you want to eat something that's green?!" (kyx, 2010) well the rice was green but it was pandan i think.

after dinner went to alliance franciase to watch RP play. the last play owned like shit compared to the first 2 plays haha. gotta be there to know why.

so went home.

and now i really need to study.

gotta hold on tight
before it slips away

fever

2010-04-27T21:17:00.004+08:00

before i start ranting about stuff, i shall first comment on...

OK. this is gonna take awhile.

the record starts off with a typical metal open palm muting from "your betrayal". although not as fast as scream aim fire, it definitely is insanely thrashy and catchy. based on simple techniques, it's definitely still one of the best songs on the record - the lack of a solo fits and doesn't make it seem as if something is missing.

then there's the title track "fever". this song would be really good if there was just a solo. i mean, with all the traditional trademarks right from the intro, wouldn't you just be expecting one?

"the last fight" is easily the best song here. no contest.

"a place where you belong" is some sort of emo ballad like "say goodnight" from the previous album, but it kinda has this more catchy solo, so thumbs up again.

"pleasure and pain" is one of the songs they played live prior to the release, but with a lyrics remake. another good song :)

"alone" has this cool intro and solo, but some parts of the song are a bit weird o.O not too bad though

from here on it gets quite boring for awhile until...

"begging for mercy". the first song they officially released off the album, it's quite scream-ish but still a very good song :) the solo is cool and quite unconventional bullet too, just that they overdid the wah ._.

that's about all interesting on the album. i suppose i would have enjoyed it more if they didn't release ALL the nicest songs prior to the release. still overall a good album, at least it got everything 4-starred and higher in my library :P

ok on to other stuff.

13.23 for 2.4, should have taken bigger steps lol. shall try my luck at re-run tomorrow... if i can.

and can you believe i'm actually mugging o.O

facade of masks

2010-04-25T13:14:00.002+08:00

we keep asking ourselves why we have to study useless subjects like maths, physics and random stuff like that. perhaps someone needs to explain to us why that horribly distasteful combination of subject options was chosen for the education system.

do you still believe that all these subjects actually make an impact in the lives of students anymore? fine, let's not count those aspiring doctors or other people who want to make a mark in the scientific field. so what about the normal people? those who want to do stuff that they prefer? are you actually giving them something useful that they can put to use in the future? the "you need it because it's tested in your PSLE/O/As" escape isn't working anymore, people.

ok that was... quite random.

listening to a wide variety of music helps widen your composing skills. compare someone who listens purely to metallica/etc. with someone who listens to stuff ranging from children of bodom to justin bieber. so much more exposure.

and YES "baby" by justin bieber is actually a nice song, just that it's overrated and underrated at the same time if you get what i mean :P

ok... so what am i supposed to do now? need a plan.

i don't need you to smile
because i know that they're not real
be yourself, don't fake your life
don't hide under a facade of masks

fight

2010-04-23T23:35:00.002+08:00

seems like it's not the first time i've been thinking about why i'm caring so much about stuff. well, because it would be much easier not to care, to wash myself clean of all these worries, emotions and tension. perhaps i'm not in my right state of mind right now, being tired in both ways once again.

and again i don't know what to post so i shall just do a filler...

i will fight one more fight
don't break down in front of me.
i will fight, will you fight?
i am not the enemy
i will try one last time
are you listening to me?
i will fight the last fight
i am not your enemy

the last fight piano version is beautiful.

throes

2010-04-16T01:20:00.001+08:00

where did i stop?

ok let me recall things for a moment.
luckily i took a nap just now if not i'd be half-dead tomorrow just like for the past few days... sleeping in class isn't good

haha tuesday was eating the chendol at some chinatown hawker centre. wish it had more ice, melts too fast ._. wonder how they earn money though, there's 2 dessert stalls with only 1 or 2 stalls in between them to prevent a violent and bloody war.

then went back to school for meeting. kinda got drenched in the rain even with an umbrella LOL lucky i took it out right before the rain turned into a downpour. meeting felt good, like the feeling of FINALLY _____ i dunno what to fill in the blank.

wednesday after lunch went to library to do greenwave poster... but then we remembered that sec3s had RE. so being the immoral person i am, i managed to get colin to borrow a notebook :D

training was one of the most interesting ones i've been to in quite a while, if you don't count muster o.O

all the periods after recess today were spent complaining about how long it was to lunch. was hungry ok ._. and the thomson prata house is GOOOOOOOOD as usual. jamming didn't go too bad, but i realise i need to mug more bass.

need to stop spending so much money too ARGH.
at least $15 on food so far this week, then u add in $8 for jamming
bleh that kinda sucks.

shall go sleep now.
even naps can't protect me for long :(

i've got even more reason to stay here
but perhaps i don't know how you feel
though i'll face it one day, somehow
hope you'll stay strong and be all right

tired

2010-04-11T01:11:00.002+08:00

argh 2 days of running all over the place have kinda exhausted me, both physically and financially ._.
and other stuff's exhausting me mentally too lol.

i dun really know what to blog about now, everything's just a blur.
haha if you told me to draw a picture of my mind right now i'd just doodle all over it so that nothing's discernible.

right now i just wanna sleep... and wake up only when i've had enough.

no more living trapped inside

countless realisations

2010-04-04T02:04:00.003+08:00

i've realised that for many things,
people are always focused on finding screw-ups they can exploit
to assure them that the winning team shouldn't have won.
that includes us and me as well.

so, forget about it. from now on,
we should instead focus more on why we lost,
so that we know exactly what to attack
before the next fight comes around.

and then when it's here, we'll see.

this and that

2010-04-01T21:22:00.005+08:00

still can't let go of that, after quite a while.
and after seeing this, it's awoken in me again.
for a second i felt like just going back in time.
even though there's that, this may not have happened.

although i know my time is long over for that,
i'll make sure it happens some time, eventually.
every small step is one step closer to that,
and this isn't over yet - it's just begun.

for now? i shall wait. we shall wait.
continue with this, and wait for that.

kudos to whoever guesses every "this" and "that" correctly.

week 2

2010-03-28T12:02:00.002+08:00

week 2 seems nice. there's a day off on thursday and good friday on... well, friday.

but then again there's arts fest ._.

and i still haven't finished my soc doc. trying to do now bleh.

again i've got the ipod acquisition syndrome...

a second heaven

lyrics

2010-03-23T00:44:00.003+08:00

argh i got so many ideas for song lyrics but i'm lazy to write them down so they just fade away.

so many concepts... wish i got time to start writing random stuff again :D i got so many random stuff tabbed and undeveloped. should piece them together one day hehe

i promise.

holidays

2010-03-21T00:14:00.002+08:00

boarding checkout and day 0 seemed like yesterday, when we all camped in mr. paul lim's room and played throughout the night.

school's gonna reopen soon ._. my homework is kinda screwed. socdoc is around 30% done, trying to do jian bao now but i'm getting sleepy. haven't done anything else.

yay for prioritisation!

well at least i have my own bed back :D

and how i miss someone to hold
when hope begins to fade

waiting

2010-03-20T00:55:00.001+08:00

i'll always be waiting.

pride

2010-03-18T16:42:00.002+08:00

i was just listening to FYE on the bus.

with all my pride as an fd instructor, i swear to rirc
that we will one day take all the 3 fdcom trophies.
national best commander,
south district champions,
and national champions.
ALL THREE OF THEM.

go ahead, laugh at me, tell me it's impossible.
tell me that it can never be done.
but i won't change my mind,
because i don't believe that it is.

somehow the rain does weird things to me.

changing

2010-03-16T18:48:00.003+08:00

ok let's start with yesterday...

reached school at around 0650.
magic tricks ending part kinda died cos some idiot koped the improvised envelope on the 3rd floor admin block -_- zzz
lunch was pizza for fdcommers :D lol it's funny watching gabriel eat pizza with a spoon and fork.
climbing over tape thingy was gooooood, but one part deo almost fell down ._. lucky leh. but at least they managed to get even li hong over xD
evac thingy was kinda oversimplified though.
dinner was a bit of a fiasco on the sec 3 side due to the undercooked rice (caused by cooking too much rice at once, leading to the pot overflowing). oh well things like that happen haha.
gosh the reaction when we told them sleeptime was from 7.30 to 1.30 was cool haha. but a bit of a disappointment cos we expected more :D

then went over to cadets' side as a whistler for night act. pity no one wanted to go to the "phoenix supervenio" area, that one probably would have freaked a lot of them out :P
got bored after awhile cos it wasn't as fun whistling as expected ._. bleh. and it was frkn hot in the phoenix jacket RAWR

after cadets went to sleep, went to shower. the renovated gym toilets are damn power ok. water heater, auto-taps, DOORS (at last) among other stuff.
had a bit of slack time before waking up the sec 3s so that was kinda the only free time i had >_>

so at 0130 i went to hide somewhere around the auditorium/cca room area. waited quite a long while until the sec 3s finally found me ._.
after that everything was quite fuzzy until it started raining at around 3. had to go chase the people sleeping at the stadium steps to move to higher ground lol.
after a bit more fa/evac was the marshmallow/waterbomb session. quite slack and fun so yea :P

went over to cadets' side again to whistle for firedrill. quite champion la... take their own time to walk, bring sleeping bag/bottles along, fidget in DIAM and stuff like that. i swear kids these days are getting more pampered ._.

after that was the raffia maze thing. not too bad, but could have made the maze more cheem though ;x
won't comment too much about task 1, just that the same thing happened again this year -_- bitch.
then went to play the final mini act 3 with cadets' side :D water bomb power. we kinda ganged omega though ._. but got ganged back in the process. oh well.

what we did with the spare water bombs ought to remain behind closed doors.

after that went to kfc to eat, and then came back to sleep. the walk on the way back was quite weird. i was half-awake so ended up walking a few metres, sleeping the next, and etc. slept in sickbay until 5.30 or so when they went to TKGS campfire.

so actually i should have been there now, but decided not to go. why?

i'm tired in two ways.

physically tired would be quite obvious. a combination of no sleep (day 1 0545 to day 2 1600) and no food (day 1 1300 to day 2 1500) is quite bad.

the other tired would be being tired of something. or rather someone. someone who i can't seem to completely hate no matter how much i want to. guess i need to harden my heart a little, because bonds can't break easily.

won't go too much into that too.

all i need is sleep now, and a good bed.

but the strange thing is that i don't feel a thing

term 1

2010-03-14T01:22:00.002+08:00

shocking how time passes by so quickly.
10 weeks of term 1 just went by like that.

this weird feeling you're never sleeping in that RIB bed again.
nor stepping into that place. hahaha.
i'm gonna miss all the waking up at 6.45 and still being on time.
not to mention the pool table. LOL

yesterday night was really a blur.

went to RLP farewell party. got chased away from the area cos they weren't ready, so went to chin-ups. do so little ._. party wasn't that bad. games were quite good... bad thing was that cream puffs ran out too quickly -_-

after that went to continue packing. then went up to mr. paul lim's room.

koped food, drinks, played rockband until around 1. then went to nick's room to play his axe awhile. went back down at around 2. then went to camp in the small aircon room with the wii. brings back good old memories of rc chalet last year... super cramped bed, mario kart. AHHHHHHHH. wish i could have all that back. so stayed there until almost 7 when we got chased out. LOL

bleh. got so much stuff to do. my hols are screwed :/

unrest

2010-03-11T14:21:00.002+08:00

it's unnerving to realise how different things were
a little less than a year ago,
or maybe even a few months ago.
so much has changed.

and i won't rest until i take everything away.
that, that, and that.
i won't leave them with anything.
one day.

one day more of school :D

FDCOM

2010-03-07T12:18:00.004+08:00

let me take a step back into the past, and see where we started from.

selecting people for fdcom squad.
taught sec 2s (then sec 1s) silver and gold.
trained standard drill as a squad.
KYX chose the song.
choreographed first draft of fancy.
trained more standard, especially for sec 2s.
tested out fancy formations.
started teaching the confirmed formations.
happy new year!
argh i don't want to continue typing le... everything's a blur after that.

well gotta relive yesterday a bit.
0545: woke up. ate a bit of bread, drank a bit of cough syrup.
0615: left house. took 43 and circle-lined. farty called.
0645: met farty, martin and wei yang at bishan mrt.
0715: changed up. left my shoe bag with jeremy ._.
0730: warm-ups. li hong's pants ripped LOL
0840: registered, led to holding area.
1050: prelims! screwed up here and there but not too bad.
1215: announcement of results.
1300: lunch. drank 1 bottle of fuji apple and nothing else.
1335: back to holding area for finals. 2 name tags broke.
1430: let's go, it's our show!
1630: announcement of final results.
1700: bersurai. feet finally could stop burning.
1715: photo, unite cheer, spirit cheer, final gabbyCOM.
1755: finally left school after deciding not to wait for farty anymore ._.
1810: started eating at LJS. kyx threw up... take care of yourself ._.
1845: farty finally came. luckily we didn't wait.
1900: went to empty area outside mrt. talked, laughed, played, slept.
2200: finally decided to go home. took 156 with farty and martin.
2230: reached home. talked about more random stuff.
0000: decided to go sleep. finally.

we've fought, we've entertained, we've won.
winners not in name, but winners in trying.
the true winners today are those that face the future with unwavering optimism.

we're even closer now that we now what to look for.
we're silenced for now, but we'll be back next time.

FDCOM 2010 is over, with 2nd in south district, 2nd national in prelims, and overall 3rd in finals.

But my work won't be done until we bring it back home.

FDCOM 2011 - will you be there?

sick

2010-02-28T13:16:00.001+08:00

bad time to fall sick ._. but better now than later RAWR

flags

2010-02-27T19:31:00.002+08:00

this time next week, how would it be?
after thought, it doesn't make that much difference, actually.

some afterthoughts about flag day... i realised that there are a few main groups of people donating. there's the elderly people who go to the market to buy stuff, the parents with kids (usually), the guy with a girl, people in groups, those who will donate just to stop you or any other collectors irritating them.

most of these people who actually willingly donate are those adults/elderly. not saying there aren't any younger people who care, but look around you, see how many people don't even bother to spend 20 seconds taking out their wallet and dropping a coin in.

then there are still those who are walking down the road, see a flag day collector and turn the other way or take a detour. seriously... who the hell do you think you are? you've probably gotten so accustomed to your comfortable lifestyle of yours that you can't even make that tiny little effort.

whether you donate to stop people from pestering you, or genuinely give because you want to help, at least you're making a difference. when that coin goes into the tin, 2 groups of people feel happier - the beneficiaries who appreciate that they have a few more cents to live on, and the collector who would feel motivated to continue collecting more.

so would u bother to go just a little bit further?
because so many screwed up people out there don't give a shit.

hopeful

2010-02-22T20:23:00.002+08:00

some people say you shouldn't take what you don't want.
maybe the same holds true for you.
so then, why'd you choose to take what you didn't want?
i don't think it was forced upon you.
unless you wanted it, but just couldn't throw it away
when you decided to lose the drive.
which one? i don't know, i don't expect you to say
knowing how you might feel about everything.

oh well. got better things to worry about.

feeling really sleepy now. but got the tutor there ._. grr. shall do philo tomorrow... can't really think half-asleep.

training today was honestly quite good, one of the better ones compared to previous times :D keep it up and jiayou guys

but still, don't look back on yesterday

clouded

2010-02-20T00:04:00.003+08:00

sometimes what we believe may be clouded by what we feel.
be it frustration, anger, disappointment or plain distaste,
emotions often get in the way of things, or so they say.
guess it's true, because sometimes we just feel things aren't right.

or at least, they're not heading in the right direction.

gotta catch up on lost sleep this weekend... probably not gonna get much the next 2 weeks ._. wish things were a bit more interesting at school though.

but mostly everything's been like a roller coaster ride.

imagine what would be happening at this time two weeks later
and we realise how close we are already

back to reality

2010-02-16T20:59:00.003+08:00

it's amazing to notice how people so different from us
can live their lives so much simpler, so much lighter.
without all the burdens and enhancements we have today,
they're still living their happy and contented lives.

back to boarding again. i still haven't played enough crisis core yet. rawr.

well, that just leaves me to stare at the homework i haven't touched. all the tian kongs + jian bao + social issues speech. and anything i may have forgotten.

and i got only 2 hours more ._.

ahh.

simple

2010-02-13T00:25:00.002+08:00

it's a big revelation when you finally realise that
understanding someone completely changes your perspective.
behind every mask and underneath all that exterior
is something not everyone can see nor understand.

but it's there.

this week was quite bleh... nothing very interesting. went for amazing race today, free admission to sentosa, and free ride on skyride/luge. wooo.

note to self: avoid eating carl's jr without a good appetite, if not you'll just end up not being able to finish half the food.

happy CNY in advance

wondering

2010-02-08T20:14:00.001+08:00

sometimes i wonder, why do i try so hard?

bitter feelings

2010-02-04T21:09:00.003+08:00

we all go about our daily lives, six billion and more of us.
everyone's so small, some maybe bigger than others.
with all the vengeance, hatred and bitter feelings around,
we often forget that everyone's like each other in some way.
everyone's the same complex web of emotions,
everyone's the same goal-driven monster,
everyone's the same self-centred coward,
everyone's the same shell that contains feelings.

everyone forgets too, so much, so often,
that we don't remember who we are.
maybe it's a better thing or just a way of life,
but either way, i'm intending to keep it that way.

but we hope for the better.

today was quite weird. there was this guy at the bus stop near orlando who kept ranting about some MP even though none of us knew him. he only gave up when our bus arrived. lol. jamming today was quite sub-standard. oh well.

hey, i think i need sleep. but there's RICE on saturday ._.

realisation

2010-02-02T22:44:00.003+08:00

it's hard to finally realise after so long,
that what once were, were actually not.
no one said that it'd be easy to accept,
but given enough time, we'll get there.

i need to stop sleeping in classes. ahhh. but today was almost completely spent out of class :P and i wish we had PL back for CLE teacher ._.

10. hearts burst into fire (bullet for my valentine)
9. this war is ours (escape the fate)
8. waking the demon (bullet for my valentine)
7. critical acclaim (a7x)
6. why (ayaka)
5. master of puppets (metallica)
4. psychosocial (slipknot)
3. afterlife (a7x)
2. sixpounder (children of bodom)
1. second heartbeat (a7x)

i'll leave it to you to guess what personal list that is.

we keep writing, talking and planning, but everything's changing

decision

2010-01-31T15:21:00.001+08:00

should i buy an iPod touch?
or should i buy a bass?
or should i save up more to buy an alexi-200?
or should i just save it and not buy anything?

either way, i still need some decent speakers ._.

hand that feeds

2010-01-30T21:33:00.002+08:00

much to think about, much to ponder,
so much time, so little time.

how now?

went jamming on thursday, got a decent recording of seize the day but apparently the file died GRR. chinese remedial yesterday got canceled :D

at the rate i'm going i think i'll be able to master the entire critical acclaim solo (syn's part) by tomorrow. but it's gonna be sloppy ._.

wishing the clock could turn back
to the days when nothing mattered

a dream

2010-01-24T21:49:00.004+08:00

what a boring singaporean lifestyle. here's a typical day:
wake up. eat. go to work. eat. continue working. go home. eat.
watch tv, have some family time and maybe more work. sleep.
rinse and repeat, throw in weekends, public holidays and vacations.

there you have it. i'm guessing it applies to other places as well.
don't like it? neither do i.
i have a better plan though, something that's much more fun.
it's a good life, but thing is, how the _____ do i get there?

ok, i'll stop dreaming now.

back in boarding. shall send all my crap to laundry from now on because i'm lazy to bring it all home. hope school's not that boring anymore.

oh well.

everything will be all right

hope

2010-01-22T21:28:00.002+08:00

have you ever wondered what it feels like to be mere inches away
from the edge of the bottomless pit of despair?
have you ever wondered what it feels like to almost lose hope
in a dream that you've held on to for so long?
have you ever wondered what it feels like to say "we can do this"
when hardly anyone else seemed to believe we could?
have you ever wondered what it feels like to want to walk away
give up that dream and never look or turn back?

maybe you have, maybe you haven't.
either way, i just did.
but when i was on the verge of abandoning all hope in that dream,
you guys brought it all back, pulled me back from the edge.

thank you.
and let's continue walking towards that dream.
if we all do, we'll get there.
bring it on.

went jamming yesterday at orlando. played stuff like almost easy, afterlife, unholy confessions and seize the day, and some other random stuff. ended up playing bass most of the time though ._. well but it was fun anyway :D

back home again. yay.

transition

2010-01-20T22:17:00.005+08:00

maybe when we're young and unexposed to the world out there,
our perspectives are different, we don't think the same.
maybe we're not so self-centered, selfish and materialistic,
innocent, untainted, pure and young at heart.
but when we go out there, out to the black cruel world laying in wait,
things will change, minds will change, we will change.
probably nothing will remain the same, we might be so different,
we might not even recognize ourselves and what we've become.

going jamming tomorrow at thomson plaza 2.30 to 5.30... should be fun.

to the days when nothing mattered

even more thoughts

2010-01-17T13:56:00.002+08:00

i want to get things done.
i don't want to antagonize everyone.
i want to pick up the pace.
i don't want to overpower anyone.
but if i have to, i will.

going back to boarding after dinner. shall bring my axe along :P i'm getting too bored already.

more thoughts

2010-01-16T23:07:00.003+08:00

and after more thinking,
i still think back
and wonder if we should have said
something different that day.
i think it would have
made a lot of difference.
we might have been better,
and certainly much happier.

but it's too late now.

thoughts

2010-01-16T22:34:00.004+08:00

what's the point of trying if seemingly no one else wants it too?
never mind that.
there are some people who take it as a chore,
i can't stand that.
what's the point of dreaming if no one wants that dream?
i can't take that.
lastly, there are people who still don't take it seriously.
leave it at that.

contemplations

2010-01-15T21:30:00.002+08:00

disorganized thoughts flying here, flying there.
i can't figure out what goes where.

people who can't be trusted, people who don't deserve to be trusted.
those that run away from things, those that speak behind your back.
all these things i hate.
yet so many good things revolve around me.

i have a dream, somewhere inside.
i don't show it, maybe because it's too absurd, too wild, wishful thinking.
but hey, it never hurts to dream big.
i can only hope i'll get there some day.

so much thoughts, i don't know what to type.

went to jam yesterday at woodworks... 18 bucks, quite ex, but oh well it was kinda impromptu anyway ._. did unholy confessions and some other random stuff.
after that still a bit early so went to bugis street and bought a new a7x shirt. the old one was too big bleh.

back home again.
the bed feels goooooooooood.

heartbeat

2010-01-10T00:37:00.003+08:00

i like my bed.

thursday was raffles trail. apparently the starting was a bit fail, but it got better as the sec 1s started coming in. ended at 7.30, by the time pack up and moved everything to room it was 7.45. cup noodles after prep time for dinner again YAY

friday was castles can fly thingy. it seemed quite fun at first during the demo, but it's really extremely boring and repetitive after awhile ._. ended up going to the breakwater area to take pics and draw stuff in the untouched part of sand. took the bus back to school, then checked out and went home. YAY again.

today's meeting wasn't too bad. kept sidetracking though. then at BK there was this cleaner who tried to stuff an inflated orange balloon into the dustbin. it was quite stubborn and only went in after awhile. best part was, she took out the balloon from the bin and gave it to some guy (i have no idea what happened) and in the end threw it into a dustbin that was more balloon-friendly.

after it ended, started walking around airport looking for stuff to do, and finally decided to play cards using slips of paper koped from the imprint area. basically martin wrote the "card" on the paper (e.g. AC - ace clubs, AH - ace hearts). sara had this imba part where he had a 10 pair remaining and played single instead of double. winner.

got a lot to think about recently... ahhhhhhhh.
maybe sometimes it's not that good to be close to someone.
because you end up caring too much, and can't harden your heart when you need to.
where's the old you? this isn't the old you.
i think we miss the old you. we need the old you back.

i feel sleepy.

boarding

2010-01-06T22:23:00.002+08:00

yay managed to borrow abhishek's account for RI-boarding. apparently the guy's on leave so he can't set our accounts for us bleh.

school's been quite boring recently. teachers are generally nice except for a few subjects (AHEM). fdcom training has been fun.

boarding isn't all that bad. still have pool to take my mind off things. hope things will be better when they finally manage to get the thing done. ahhh. and i hate the 11.30 curfew. too early, can't fall asleep for at least 30mins ._. although the 6.45 am wake up time is nice.

shall blog more when i go back home. rawr.

happy new year

2010-01-01T00:37:00.003+08:00

happy new year :D

ok shall try to come up with some resolutions but i doubt i'll fulfill them all.

(in no particular order)
1. CLEAN SWEEP
2. sleep more
3. get a GPA of 3.4 (i don't want to aim toooooo high)
4. pass HMT O's
5. be a better friend to everyone
6. become a better person (yea this one is VERY wide)
7. learn afterlife solo and do a tribute cover for the rev during rs'10
8. lots of stuff i wanted to put down but forgot. bleh

may 2010 be an even better year.
the year of the clean sweep.

BRING IT ON.

RIP the rev of a7x.

2009-12-30T23:23:00.005+08:00

a lot to post about lol.

outing on 26th... went to downtown east ehub to bowl. haha it was more of a B58 vs VI thingy, 1 lane each xD eh 75 only lor :( not good bleh. after that went to KFC to play cards ._. my luck kinda died so lost every round. rawr. apparently that only wasted 1h, so we decided to go all the way to airport to continue playing cards until 6. yatyg softie and farty had to zao, so left with me kyx and martin to go ikea. ate dinner at the food court at giant then took shuttle bus back to sengkang. bleh the dumb bus stoned at courts for so long zzz.

then fa duty for slc on 28th and 29th. got caught playing drawbridge ._. nothing much on the first day except for campfire since no one fell sick. found interesting stuff in the sickbay though. fun to read. ended up sleeping at 1130 since the lights out for the campers was at 1100. woke up at 7+ the next day while kyx continued on until 9. and all the small naps until richmond came in with a fever. bleh. dragonboating was fun. but it does make you have a one-sided ache ._.

shall stop here for now.
fdcom wooooo

glenn: eh i've given up on maple a long time ago xD
JK: lol i started recently only ._.
jem: haha i only test in FF, lazy to crossbrowser it
soyeon: merry christmas too haha a bit late though
clar: haithar too why u move to tumblr o.O

and i quote,

"It is with great sadness and heavy hearts that we tell you of the passing today of Jimmy “The Rev” Sullivan. Jimmy was not only one of the world's best drummers, but more importantly he was our best friend and brother. Our thoughts and prayers go out to Jimmy's family and we hope that you will respect their privacy during this difficult time.
Jimmy you are forever in our hearts.
We love you.

M Shadows, Synyster Gates, Zacky Vengeance and Johnny Christ"

RIP.

boundaries

2009-12-20T21:09:00.002+08:00

sort of a filler... i dunno.

been trying to play so many different stuff like afterlife solo and inventing random licks. and michael angelo batio is just an ass. i really have no idea how he plays that fast on no boundaries.

and i'm running out of things to do at home. seeing as the holiday's gonna end soon, maybe it isn't such a bad thing. but it's been really fast, 2 weeks to school reopening in the blink of an eye ._.

yay can get out of the house tomorrow.

home ground

2009-12-15T20:49:00.002+08:00

hmm where to start again.

stopped playing crisis core after completing the story le.

last week was spent mainly on fdcom. bertha kwok and friends came down on thurs to recce ._. hadi and the bring it on sign. lol.

today wasn't too bad, crashed 2 houses in a row... and cleaned out brendan's fridge :P why does b59 have so many rich people.

drinking ice-cold nescafe mocha for breakfast isn't a very good idea.

addicted to bfmv recently... especially the songs from road to nowhere EP like watching us die tonight.

i really want a 16GB ipod.

and i like the 50-25-25 pizza sharing plan. even more reason to win fdcom :D champion or nothing!

all that probably sounds quite disorganized. just like how my head is now.

HOME GROUND!

we've been here before
bring it on, taking action

loveless

2009-12-06T01:24:00.002+08:00

when the war of the beasts brings about the world’s end
the goddess descends from the sky
wings of light and dark spread afar
she guides us to bliss, her gift everlasting

infinite in mystery is the gift of the goddess
we seek it thus, and take it to the sky
ripples form on the water’s surface
the wandering soul knows no rest

there is no hate, only joy
for you are beloved by the goddess
hero of the dawn, healer of worlds
dreams of the morrow hath the shattered soul
pride is lost
wings stripped away, the end is nigh

my friend, do you fly away now?
to a world that abhors you and i?
all that awaits you is a somber morrow
no matter where the winds may blow
my friend, your desire
is the bringer of life, the gift of the goddess
even if the morrow is barren of promises
nothing shall forestall my return

my friend, the fates are cruel
there are no dreams, no honor remains
the arrow has left the bow of the goddess
my soul, corrupted by vengeance
hath endured torment, to find the end of the journey
in my own salvation
and your eternal slumber
legend shall speak
of sacrifice at world’s end
the wind sails over the water’s surface
quietly, but surely.

even if the morrow is barren of promises
nothing shall forestall my return
to become the dew that quenches the land
to spare the sands, the seas, the skies
i offer thee this silent sacrifice

loveless from crisis core.

motivation

2009-12-05T00:19:00.002+08:00

this thing seems like it's been dead for quite awhile... probably because i've been playing crisis core for the past few days and been out almost all the time for the few days before that.

hmm... went to welcome back uip ppl on monday. kyx decided to take some fat detour and we ended up walking around for 45 mins before finally reaching the nostalgic 42 bus stop. bleh. went to macs on the way. then went to paya lebar macs for lunch... farty late as usual :P after that zaoed to li hong's house to choreograph fdcom... FRKN NICE PLACE RAWR. waterfront condo and all that crap. really feels like some sort of hotel resort. bleh. finally finished at around 7.30. woohoo

tuesday was AGM, went to kallang macs because apparently the kfc didn't have the free flow machine anymore. typical singaporean abuse of free stuff. claimed all the instant win crap too. stayed all the way till 6+... at the same table/chair rawr. and had to pay sara the 1 buck grrrr.

fdcom training on wednesday... halfway through kin wai crashed. epic suanner ._. some VIs came also to the CAC area... probably to meet farty or something haha. CIRCLE OF DEATH

past 2 days have been literally spent on crisis core. storyline is imba, gameplay and graphics are pawar. the tragic love story is kinda sad though. shall finish off the final boss tmrw or something o.O

hmm. and we really need to win fdcom. BRING IT ON RAWR

hard news, taken harder, don't look to me
disappointed, we don't agree, i don't need your praise

one

2009-11-27T14:25:00.003+08:00

AON over le... was dam fun haha

at first supposed to meet at 7, then me and farty reached at 7.05 rawr
bus screwed up and came late
lazy to remember all of the stuff, but being casualty for everything except mission 4 is blehhh
realise it's one the first camps without firedrill :D but everything having FA/evac more than makes up for that lol
slept around 2h at night... frkn cold cos only bring bedsheet ._.

ok now i'm really lazy to remember anything else.
pics i have are on fb.

feel like taking a nap.
yawn.

don't stare up the steps
just step up the stairs

hellhound

2009-11-22T15:52:00.002+08:00

went to ikea to buy camp stuff. hugging all the soft toys and pillows were dam retarded ._. and the ice mocha at beach road was good :D

bleh quite busy these few days. need sleep.

it's quite interesting how i can get addicted to hellhounds on my trail (bodom) and for your entertainment (lambert) when they're both light years apart in genre.

to the wrong turn
to the right direction

quiet

2009-11-15T02:17:00.003+08:00

kyx paused his stalking and just went to bathe. haha

went to watch 2012 yesterday. probably best movie i've watched this year, and i have 4 old tickets in my wallet ._. just realised that's a lot, 4 in 6 months. anyway, it's really thought-provoking. questions our human-ness (humanity doesn't seem to fit). what would you do when you know you'll meet your maker soon? how would you feel? who would you save?

in a way reminds me of the SAW concept, where jigsaw's traps only kill those who don't have the will to live, and tests that same will in subjecting the sad people to torture in order to escape, or just exchange pain for death. then links again to the nietzsche dmp, will to power and whatever. rawr everything seems connected.

but it's really impossible to tell the truth if someone asks you that question isn't it. would you really saved your loved ones and friends if it were a choice between them and you to live? because self-sacrifice probably isn't as easy as it sounds.

hmm i really wonder how it would be like nearing the dec 21 2012 date in reality. would everyone panic, would the media come up with some weird stuff to loose pandemonium among us? and what actually would happen that day. oh well if die then die lor, would be inevitable anyway. what's coming will come.

won't talk about night safari trip just now, quite boring because i'm not really into such stuff :P BUT ANYTHING BEN & JERRY'S WITH CHOCOLATE FUDGE OWNS YOU MUAHAHA

lol.

thanks for the pikachu :)

cause i know this flame isn't dying
so nothing can stop me from trying

sleep

2009-11-13T01:24:00.003+08:00

back from rc chalet le... hmm see can recall everything or not

started with fd accreds, still dunno how u take 15min to change. ended a bit late cos had to clear non-passes/failures, went to dump feng's boots in sickbay. then zaoed to pasir ris and had lunch at 4pm at the white sands macs.

after that went to the chalet at costa sands... frkn small but still can squeeze haha. put bag down sit on bed immediately get taupoked by kyx ahhhh. then played bridge/wii until 9 before going for dinner. lol retarded rabbit game which made everyone go nuts

went to bk for dinner... was eating the turkey bacon students meal when farty decided to go prank call sara using the indian accent and talking about some macs order. failed cos sara recognized farty within the first 10 secs rawr. then they bought me a sundae pie woooo. after dinner was finished then we decided to go prank call feng this time. farty again with some english accent, acting as some bigshot debates guy from MOE. succeeded woohoo but had to go tell him cos of possible implications bleh.

back to the room and continued bridge/wii until 3.30 or so and finally fell asleep. me kyx yatyg crammed onto a bit more than half of one of the two squished single beds and han sheng/jee kinn shared the rest. ahhhh squeezy

second day was basically... wake up. go for breakfast. play wii/bridge. go for lunch. play again. go for dinner and clear all the fries from instant win.

only funny part was when me kyx hansheng started playing truth or truth and cheat at the same time. the part where yatyg woke up was funny too. slept at around 3.

woke up, went macs for breakfast, went back to wii/pack up, and then collect APR from sch. 3.15 bleh.

4h power nap win.

"Good evening, may I speak to Mr. Feng Yu Hui please?"

"Slowpoke la you."
"Haven't evolved into Slaking what."

*wakes up*
"Where's everyone?"
"Gone for breakfast."
"Now what time?"
"6 am. Actually, 1.31."

yay more sleep.

fifteen

2009-11-10T01:45:00.001+08:00

feels funny to know that you're fifteen and there's lots of stuff tomorrow.
ahh.

anger

2009-11-08T17:37:00.001+08:00

shut up, you bitch. i've had enough. you don't even know what i'm doing. get out of my face.

third

2009-11-07T23:58:00.002+08:00

haven't gotten back apr. hopefully it's higher than the 3.2 printed on the sheet.

home visit was weird, won't say too much about it. those who went should know what happened to my name AHHH

last day of school seems so indifferent this year. don't know why, maybe because i'm still with the same people, or it happens so many times that it's become nothing special, or just a lot of stuff in november so it doesn't actually seem like liberation. like the end of any other school week, which just means later nights, more sleep, and no afterlife blasting at 6 am trying to tear me away from blissful oblivion in sleep.

3rd for facom. scgs won cos of the dumb YO 10 point bonus, which everyone thinks is retarded. yatyg's imba strategy of loopholing and skipping last station got 1st in speed and denied rgs of their 1st place. woohoo. good job to team anyway. taking videos of the run was fun, but pics was irritating especially when SOME IDIOT kept trying to disturb.

and until now i still don't know if i'm really happy when i smile. maybe it's a cover, i don't know. i just realised i don't know myself that well.

let's hope things get better.

bother me tomorrow
today i'll buy no sorrows

3.2

2009-11-03T22:06:00.003+08:00

eng 3.6, chinese 2.4, maths1 2.4, maths2 2.8, ss 2.8, phys 3.2, chem 3.6, geog 3.2, hist 3.6.

overall 3.2 bleh.

shall post more when i think of stuff.

can you say what you can't do in darkness of the eyes
the wrecking voice stain mirror awaiting the first sixpounder

self-control

2009-10-31T00:14:00.002+08:00

yay.

chem 61/80, overall 3.6. not a bad start to the day haha. ok guess it all went downhill from there.
phys 48/80, overall probably 3.2. big drop sigh. but wasn't expecting that high anyway, so who cares.
then best of all, chinese paper 2, 42.5/110. not gonna talk about it, because chinese is dumb in the first place.
ok maybe this is the best. geog 28/40, overall 3.2. didn't mug for geog lor haha. smoking skills woohoo.

nothing much else for today bleh.

can you stop nagging. it's getting irritating. i've been trying to explain that half the class fails chinese but no, you insist on making noise and telling me to do all kinds of shit to improve the score. if you think it's so easy trying to juggle ten papers in 2 weeks, you go ahead and try it. and don't give me the shit that i should have started earlier, because i'm not the kind of person who has nothing better to do but study. i don't know why, but i'm getting the feeling you don't really understand me that well.

and most of all, i still haven't seen the point of studying chinese to this extent. isn't the main aim for us to communicate? yet i have not seen one iota of evidence that proves endless comprehensions, cloze passages, compositions, summaries, book reports, magazine reports and worksheets are ever going to help us gain footing. just ask around, how many students actually take chinese seriously, and not something to pull down your average grades. and we're not appreciating our culture either, because the language being forced upon us is simply ruining our impression of it due to the methods utilized.

just think, will you.

'cause you don't understand
i do what i can

distorted

2009-10-28T23:53:00.002+08:00

went down to excelsior again to test out pedals and stuff yesterday.
went peeking around in davis and then realised they had no hm-100 or the like. then started staring at the entire wall of accessories/strings/crap they had.

SV branch that actually had the hm-100 was closed, so went to kfc to eat "lunch" at 11. still love the cheese fries.

went back to SV to test the pedal... it sounds much better than the current distortion on mine (maybe it's the amp), so shall go get it this weekend or next week :) 55 + 25 for adaptor is ok i guess

then broke the high E-string this morning. ahhh. was trying to tune it down to D for drop C, then suddenly piak. oh well about time to change anyway.
shall go restring with ernie ball/DR/d'addario when i get the pedal too.

that's it with 5 strings... and i pasted the roktex sticker there :P

trying not to think about results.

changing, better to turn and walk away
fading, all these lights just turn to grey

liberation

2009-10-25T00:10:00.002+08:00

end of EOYs feels good.

english was ok... can't tell if i screwed up but shouldn't be too bad
chinese paper 1 was zzz. wrote lots of crap. and with the cyh leak lol. should have tried to stay awake even though it was impossible. but nvm
screwed up ss. argument died. ahhhhhhh.

then a bit of break during weekend (mostly mugging except when jem started tcing at yatyg's house)

chem and hist were ok yay
maff paper 1 was tricky. died a bit. paper 2 wasn't that bad. but might be wrong somewhere ahhh
phys died a bit too but not that much. geog wrote lots of shit. i have no idea whether its ok
chinese paper 2 was zzzzz cos spent too much time on the front part and left 15min for 25marks. yay. left 10 marks blank

over le anyway. haha.

uip selection was fun :) hurhur

shall try to get more sleep.
and sweep.

slumber

2009-10-13T18:31:00.003+08:00

all i want is to close my eyes and forget.